Id like to believe that our lives have meaning, that the day-to-day decisions we make steer our steps down a variety of roads in life. As in the poem by Robert Frost, moving in one direction can leave us wondering about what would have happened had we taken the other road.

I dont believe Frost meant that we regret our choices, simply that new realities unfold as we move forward, and they are different than if we had moved left or right instead. Our decisions affect others as well, unfolding and connecting in ways we can only accept and not really understand.

One of my favorite thoughts is that from each difficulty we encounter, no matter how painful, some good will come of it; our tempering or pruning, if you will. It is our place to trust.

This I know. Eleven years ago, Heidi, the daughter of my dear friend Sue Sands, was diagnosed with Leukemia. Her family held a sign-up for Be The Match, the National Bone Marrow Donor Registry, in hopes of finding a stem cell donor to cure her.

I couldnt attend that evening, but shortly after I had a vivid dream in which I was a bone marrow match for Heidi. I knew I had to get tested, so I found another sign-up, did a cheek swab and entered the registry. I wasnt called to be a match for Heidi. In fact, she underwent treatment and was able to recover without a bone marrow transplant.

There was more to come. In 2009 I turned out to be a perfect match for a little girl who happened to be the same age as my daughter. Its more than just matching a blood type; a person must closely match on human leukocyte antigen. I agreed to donate bone marrow and it was a completely anonymous donation.

Let me give you the simplified version of donating bone marrow and stem cells. There are two ways; blood stem cells and bone marrow. In the former, the donor is given a medicine to boost stem cell formation and then the cells are drawn from their blood. In the latter, the donor undergoes surgery where the stem cells are harvested from the back of their hip bones. The stem cells are given to the recipient in about 48 hours, and if all goes well, they are completely cured of their disease.

People tell me they are amazed I would do this for someone I dont know. How could I not? When I was about 23, my mother died of multiple myeloma bone cancer. A little over a year ago, my stepmother succumbed to pancreatic cancer. I know intimately what it is like to feel helpless when a loved one is sick. I know the sense of loss that remains.

I recovered from the bone marrow donation. Yes I was sore for several weeks, and tired, but it felt good to have done something. Yet, there was more to the story. Mayo Clinic doctors had discovered in my pre-donation blood work that I had elevated calcium levels. It was due to a parathyroid tumor, and it was taking calcium from my bones. It didnt affect my ability to donate, but they advised removal of the tumor soon after.

Had I not been a donor, I might never have known about the parathyroid issue until it had severely affected my health. It still gives me shivers to think about it.

Fast forward to this past December. I was working on page layout one afternoon when I received a call from Be the Match. I was a potential match for another patient, this time an adult woman with Leukemia. I am at the top of the preferred age group, but I was the perfect match to potentially save this persons life.

Now, back to the idea of paths intermingling. My friends daughter Heidi, who had beat her leukemia, was dealt a tough blow. A few weeks ago she was diagnosed once again with leukemia, not the same type, but different. It was like lightning striking twice.

My mind instantly went back to my initial dream. What can this mean, that I am called to donate twice, defying so many odds, at the same time she is diagnosed again, against so many odds?

Last week I completed the second bone marrow donation for an unknown recipient. The doctors and nurses on the ninth floor of the Charleton Building at Mayo Clinic were amazing. They took such good care of me and thanked me repeatedly. The procedure went well and my APG employers have been gracious to give me time off for the whole thing.

I am oh so very tired, but the soreness in my hips is better each day. The need to build up the hemoglobin in my blood has made me extra conscientious of my diet. I am thankful for my good health and also for the friends, who brought food, checked in on me and have provided support through this donation process.

What does it all mean? We need each other. What we can do for another person in desperate need, we should do.

I hope and pray for a full recovery for Heidi. They will look for a bone marrow match for her this time around. Maybe I am a match for her after all? The doctor last week said that I could theoretically donate again once I was 100 percent recovered and if my hemoglobin levels were perfect.

Maybe I am not a match, but through my story, others will join the registry and Heidis match will be found. I guess its OK to not know what it all means. Knowing that something good will come is enough.

Reach Publisher and Editor Terri Lenz at 333-3148, or follow her on Twitter.com @KenyonLeader

Reach Publisher and Editor Terri Lenz at 333-3148, or follow her on Twitter.com @KenyonLeader

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Not knowing what it means is OK, follow your path - Southernminn.com